Good thread.
1. Is your pepe a delicate flower or do you work in the medical or sewage field? If so, wash your hands before letting your boy out. All others, get in these habits and have a little more faith in the resiliency of your unit.
2. Do most things closed handed throughout the day, hitting the elevator or printer button, pushing in a drawer, opening a door, etc.
3. For push doors, open by making a fist and pushing. If not possible, push a foot higher or lower on the door than the allocated place/knob. Those parts of the door are almost never touched, except by pros like me.
4. If it's a pull door and it's even slightly ajar, grab the edge to pull. Top of the door is best, but side of the door works also.
5. If you deuce, always wash you sick fuk.
6. If using the urinal, and you use previously mentioned techniques daily, your boy doesn't need you washing prior to pissing.
7. You SHOULD, however, wash post piss. You may THINK your clean, but your nutsack and schlong have been stewing in the equivalent of a moderate temperature oven all day...the bacteria in that sweat is something I'd prefer you not spread around the office. K Thanks.
8. Keep a clean workspace. Grab one of these. They're cheap and effective.
9. This isn't rocket science. Wash bc you're as gross as everyone else, use the closed hand method everywhere, and be creative (I'd argue common-sensical) by using parts of doors, desks, other things you come into contact with on a daily basis.
