Fathers with Athletic Children ITT

[nathajw]

I need advice on where to draw the line.

I have a 7 year old son that plays baseball and was selected by a select/travel team that found him while he was playing city league. He's done one tournament so far (two cancelled due to rain) and the skill level some kids have to play baseball at such a young age is unreal. His team rolled up a 6-4-3 twice in one game as well as worked a rundown for at least 4 throws before the tag. 3 or 4 of these boys consistently rip line drives to the back of the batting cages in practice. On a rope. First graders!

I'm sure many parents on here have or had kids the same skill level that played on these teams but damn I was blown away when I first watched these booger-eaters practice and take infield. He's an incredible athlete, twice what I ever was at his age. Runs point on his basketball team, runs like the wind and has twice the hand eye coordination that his 10 year old brother does and I wouldn't consider our 10 year old to be even remotely unathletic.

Here's my ordeal, he's a goofball. If he was even remotely serious half the time who knows how good he could be. Clowning around in practice, can't keep his hands to himself, etc. Some of these kids on his team are obsessed with baseball and Grayson just wants to wrestle his brother in the front yard or play zombies or whatever your average 7 year old does. He just plays to play the game and sometimes I feel myself getting a lil' too intense with him during practice or games. I've been regularly pitching to him and working baseball with him since he was 3 but now that he's on this select tournament team it's been an hour in the garage every night puttin' in the work. Sometimes it's pulling teeth to get him in there but I don't want him falling behind the other kids because you seriously have to "re-tryout" for this team every season.

How did you balance pushing your kid to be their best in sports with the fact that they're 7 freakin' years old or whatever and maybe just want to be a kid? This insane level of competitiveness in the Metroplex is all new to me. I'm already getting pay by the hour former pro private lesson recommendations .....for my 1st grader.

2 from right, back row. Tourney champs bling.

 

[anon_ph7vrsh7abnty]

My brother and I were both starters and sometimes the best player in every sport we played: baseball, basketball, football, tennis, soccer, etc. This was back before they locked you into one thing.

My dad regularly pushed me until I puked. I ended up dropping all other sports and playing a sport he wouldn't coach: tennis.


This is my roundabout way of saying that showing up for his practices/games and just showing passion for his triumphs and struggles is enough push to keep him in it.

 

[nathajw]

This was back before they locked you into one thing.

Ain't this the truth. His coaches in a not too direct way have basically told me that if he plays flag football in the Fall that he will lose his roster spot. Nowadays it's like winter and non-winter sports, that's it. In the 80s/early 90s we were encouraged to play everything.

 

[anon_ph7vrsh7abnty]

I'm surprised there haven't been suits about this.

Mine is 3, and I plan on grinding people into the ground when it comes to opportunities to play multi-sports.


My feeling: if a kid beats everyone out with less practice, that's their problem. Get better genes or something.

 

[SamuraiFred]

My sister in law lives in the metroplex and has her son in all manner of sports. Baseball is the main one, and while he's a great kid he's just not all that good in my opinion which is perfectly fine because he's 7. Anyway, they have him in all manner of private lessons and the instructors are feeding her all of this bullshit like "he could be a future pro"......you know, stuff that any rational human being would know is bullshit.
It's amazing what people will spend their money on.

 

[Mr. Blonde]

Ain't this the truth. His coaches in a not too direct way have basically told me that if he plays flag football in the Fall that he will lose his roster spot. Nowadays it's like winter and non-winter sports, that's it. In the 80s/early 90s we were encouraged to play everything.

Basically until puberty, it is in their interest to play as many sports as possible. The Sports Gene covers this some. But playing all of the different sports will help you improve at all of them, and you might discover you like one better. All good things.

 

[anon_ph7vrsh7abnty]

Basically until puberty, it is in their interest to play as many sports as possible. The Sports Gene covers this some. But playing all of the different sports will help you improve at all of them, and you might discover you like one better. All good things.

This. I'm not a doctor, but it seems logical that performing the same tasks year round will lead to injury .esp from a young age.

 

[nathajw]

My sister in law lives in the metroplex and has her son in all manner of sports. Baseball is the main one, and while he's a great kid he's just not all that good in my opinion which is perfectly fine because he's 7. Anyway, they have him in all manner of private lessons and the instructors are feeding her all of this bullshit like "he could be a future pro"......you know, stuff that any rational human being would know is bullshit.
It's amazing what people will spend their money on.

Right, I played baseball into HS. I don't need to spend $50-$80 an hour to have someone else tell my 7 year old to keep his hands inside ball, don't pull your head, don't lunge, follow through contact, palm up/palm down, etc. If he's 16 and has a future in baseball and needs pitching lessons or something that's one thing but hitting lessons at 7? GTFO.

 

[Dally1up]

Be careful as he is a kid. Let him be a kid. Teach him to respect the coaches first and foremost and hopefully your coach realizes the limits of a 7 yo kid in regards to attention span, goofing off, etc. To go out and create a 3 hour work filled practice with no lapses in attention span is asking for too much at that age. I have seen it happen to youngsters, the youngsters are very good players but literally take the field not as children but as robots. I have seen these types literally break down under pressure. There is as much more to be learned through failures as there is through perfection and winning. Sadly many coaches don't realize this. As they mature age wise, the kids need to realize more and more that practice is about business and working hard, learning etc. but you cannot treat a 7yo like a 10yo like a 14yo, etc.

Don't overpush him as I have seen kids that literally want to quit before they are teens. As for private lessons, I would wait a couple of years. I know a few people who have played at major baseball levels (college and minors) who work for the Athletic Facilities as trainers and they laugh about how early parents pay for lessons that don't matter at that age. I tend to think that 10 is a good age to start to utilize some special services (pitching -especially girls fp, hitting (correcting flaws), etc).

Backyard stuff is always good as those are the memories that you will remember the rest of your life but remember when he sees the neighbor out shooting baskets or playing with a toy allow him to go join in the fun. Also remember not to be too critical on those evenings where he is making mistakes in the backyard. Very easy to get down on him/her. In looking at him and how he develops you will have to look a lot at yourself and ask what the motivation is for your desire to pay for lessons, your desire to push, your desire to travel, spend the $$ etc. If the desire is about yourself (we are all guilty of this to some degree) you really need to stop and think about it for a bit. Get yourself in the right frame of mind. My last bit of advice is that travel sports brings out the absolute worst in many parents and coaches. The drama that goes with it is sickening at times. At games, practices, etc. my advice is that you stay as far away from the internal parental communication as you can. I know of many parents that literally watch their boys/girls from the outfield away from the bleacher moms/dads who can't let the game be a game. Many a good person, parent, etc can become toxic inside the confines of a ball field and the toxicity can be contagious. Stay away from the madness for your own sanity.

 

[squeak]

I played all sports til I was 10. I then just focused on golf but for one year of JH basketball. I missed out on a lot of fun hanging with friends and playing other sports. I regret that and so does my dad. I got to college lost my love for the game. Total burnout. In the past 18 years I've probably played fewer than 50 times. I just turned 40 and I'm just now getting excited to play again. I won't let the same thing happen with my son.

It is absolutely ridiculous how good some of these little kids are and how nuts their parents are. Play AS MANY SPORTS AS POSSIBLE until you're at least 12-13.

 

[MegaPoke]

I remember Gundy saying he liked multisport guys because it helped them develop overlapping skill sets.

That said, I work with a lot of high school athletes and while it's not uncommon to see a football/baseball (or track) guy you rarely see football / basketball or 3 sport guys anymore.

That's just varsity though. I have an athletic 8th grade daughter who is doing volleyball basketball and golf or track. I think if the kid is interested you do multiple sports through middle school

 

[tcpoke]

As long as he is having fun then you aren't pushing anything too much. If it starts feeling like a chore/work, then it's probably become too much. At some point he won't have the time/desire to cultivate his imagination playing zombies and stuff like that.

I too have a 7 year old who loves sports. I'm also not willing to sacrifice all of our free time as a family so he can go to practice, tournaments, etc. I also know chances are he isn't going to be a professional athlete. He still has plenty of time to play sports, and while that ends at some point to a degree, our time as a family is truly limited when talking about just the four of us. At some point family time will involve girlfriends and boyfriends and then spouses and the time of just us four is essentially gone forever.

 

[squeak]

One other thing, I don't see any problem getting kids lessons or coaches, even before 12. Doesn't have to be much. Often kids respond better to someone that's not Dad.

 

[WCPoke]

I need advice on where to draw the line.

I have a 7 year old son that plays baseball and was selected by a select/travel team that found him while he was playing city league. He's done one tournament so far (two cancelled due to rain) and the skill level some kids have to play baseball at such a young age is unreal. His team rolled up a 6-4-3 twice in one game as well as worked a rundown for at least 4 throws before the tag. 3 or 4 of these boys consistently rip line drives to the back of the batting cages in practice. On a rope. First graders!

I'm sure many parents on here have or had kids the same skill level that played on these teams but damn I was blown away when I first watched these booger-eaters practice and take infield. He's an incredible athlete, twice what I ever was at his age. Runs point on his basketball team, runs like the wind and has twice the hand eye coordination that his 10 year old brother does and I wouldn't consider our 10 year old to be even remotely unathletic.

Here's my ordeal, he's a goofball. If he was even remotely serious half the time who knows how good he could be. Clowning around in practice, can't keep his hands to himself, etc. Some of these kids on his team are obsessed with baseball and Grayson just wants to wrestle his brother in the front yard or play zombies or whatever your average 7 year old does. He just plays to play the game and sometimes I feel myself getting a lil' too intense with him during practice or games. I've been regularly pitching to him and working baseball with him since he was 3 but now that he's on this select tournament team it's been an hour in the garage every night puttin' in the work. Sometimes it's pulling teeth to get him in there but I don't want him falling behind the other kids because you seriously have to "re-tryout" for this team every season.

How did you balance pushing your kid to be their best in sports with the fact that they're 7 freakin' years old or whatever and maybe just want to be a kid? This insane level of competitiveness in the Metroplex is all new to me. I'm already getting pay by the hour former pro private lesson recommendations .....for my 1st grader.

2 from right, back row. Tourney champs bling.

Push him harder.
Send him to an "academy" (boarding school).
Change his name...from Grayson to Tyreek.

 

[osu2082]

I think the key is as others have said is as long as he is enjoying it then give him every opportunity to develop but if it isn't enjoyable for you and him you might want to back off. He will only be 7 once, 8 once and so on. Soon the innocence and adornment of dad will go away to a degree so I would spend all of that time you can doing stuff you enjoy.

You also have to be careful comparing your kid to others as age, physical size and birth order can be major factors in young kids "skill levels." Just a handful of those kids will turn into the same level of player at the HS level and then obviously that number goes way down every level above that.

 

[Marshal Jim Duncan]

A lot of good advice here. Make sure they're enjoying whatever they're doing. Communicate about whether they'd rather try something else.

I also think parents can use good judgment and you can determine which kids ca n be pushed a little more or when they can be pushed and when to back off.

 

[Rdcldad]

I'd say as a parent be ready for the day some kid rolls out of bed and comes to practice with another kid.

They hand him a bat and he's cranking line drives. He runs like a deer and throws seeds cause god built him that way.

You put hours in the cage, pitching lessons pay Ozzie smith a million bucks for SS lessons and the coach says hey we don't have a spot for you anymore cause this little shit takes your kids spot.

Better yet your kid does have the goods and some asshole coach throws him 240 pitches in a state tourney weekend and that left shoulder doesn't get loose anymore.

My oldest started in class A ball as a frosh. Gets down the line in 3.93 and throws darts from the LF corner to 2nd.
He checks boxes, he has tools...

However his swing is awful, base running raw and as a senior to be knowledge of the game rudimentary.

I coached him for five years bring him along slow then was estranged from him (his moms a peach) five years ago. I get to watch him play every game fall and spring. I text him pointers but don't get to take him to camps or put him in legion ball where he gets a chance to grow.

First and foremost I thank god he's playing ball and will have the memories.

The rest just becomes life's fluff

Be proud of that bling and high achievement just know that life happens

Good luck

 

[100TonsofOrangeFury]

I need advice on where to draw the line.

I have a 7 year old son that plays baseball and was selected by a select/travel team that found him while he was playing city league. He's done one tournament so far (two cancelled due to rain) and the skill level some kids have to play baseball at such a young age is unreal. His team rolled up a 6-4-3 twice in one game as well as worked a rundown for at least 4 throws before the tag. 3 or 4 of these boys consistently rip line drives to the back of the batting cages in practice. On a rope. First graders!

I'm sure many parents on here have or had kids the same skill level that played on these teams but damn I was blown away when I first watched these booger-eaters practice and take infield. He's an incredible athlete, twice what I ever was at his age. Runs point on his basketball team, runs like the wind and has twice the hand eye coordination that his 10 year old brother does and I wouldn't consider our 10 year old to be even remotely unathletic.

Here's my ordeal, he's a goofball. If he was even remotely serious half the time who knows how good he could be. Clowning around in practice, can't keep his hands to himself, etc. Some of these kids on his team are obsessed with baseball and Grayson just wants to wrestle his brother in the front yard or play zombies or whatever your average 7 year old does. He just plays to play the game and sometimes I feel myself getting a lil' too intense with him during practice or games. I've been regularly pitching to him and working baseball with him since he was 3 but now that he's on this select tournament team it's been an hour in the garage every night puttin' in the work. Sometimes it's pulling teeth to get him in there but I don't want him falling behind the other kids because you seriously have to "re-tryout" for this team every season.

How did you balance pushing your kid to be their best in sports with the fact that they're 7 freakin' years old or whatever and maybe just want to be a kid? This insane level of competitiveness in the Metroplex is all new to me. I'm already getting pay by the hour former pro private lesson recommendations .....for my 1st grader.

2 from right, back row. Tourney champs bling.

I'll repeat that there is much wisdom in this thread, really like dally's remarks, but not all of it really answers your questions.

I've been both a dad, several times, and a coach in this world you're navigating. If you like this world, and your son likes playing in this world, it takes work and sacrifice. Families that value time at the lake don't play select baseball or soccer, for the most part. If you are all OK with the sacrifices, and time with your kid doing something they love and you enjoy watching to me was never a sacrifice at all, then don't feel bad about pursuing it. Don't feel bad about telling your kid it's time to go hit, because you're an adult and realize the work required to perform at the level he's being asked to perform. He won't be scarred by work, only by the psycho parent mind games that sometimes go along with it. As well outlined above by others.

My advice: have a blast. It goes by quick. Enjoy every weekend, and know going in that baseball is a game of failure, and he will fail. And you are OK with that and will help build him back up when it happens.

My other advice: find another team without moron coaches who would tell you straight up that 2nd graders can't play flag football. It's none of their business what your kid does away from their baseball time. If he's missing important baseball stuff, that's another matter. Easier said than done in finding other teams, depending on where you live. But coaches so driven in 7U as to put in these arbitrary rules will find other ways to severely piss you off in the coming years, so beware. It's probably their first time through the deal, and think those kinds of restrictions are required to compete. They're not. 90% of the top 10U-13U teams play light in the fall because most of their kids are playing some form of football.

Final point: any mention of pro athletics in kids sports is pointless. Sane people don't entertain ideas that their skilled little kid "may" play pro sports. Some will, that's a fact. But this point should drive no one's decision-making about anything when kids are little. If the kid needs lessons, do it for no other reason than that it'll help him create good habits now and help him get a few more hits this weekend.

 

[nathajw]

I'll repeat that there is much wisdom in this thread, really like dally's remarks, but not all of it really answers your questions.

I've been both a dad, several times, and a coach in this world you're navigating. If you like this world, and your son likes playing in this world, it takes work and sacrifice. Families that value time at the lake don't play select baseball or soccer, for the most part. If you are all OK with the sacrifices, and time with your kid doing something they love and you enjoy watching to me was never a sacrifice at all, then don't feel bad about pursuing it. Don't feel bad about telling your kid it's time to go hit, because you're an adult and realize the work required to perform at the level he's being asked to perform. He won't be scarred by work, only by the psycho parent mind games that sometimes go along with it. As well outlined above by others.

My advice: have a blast. It goes by quick. Enjoy every weekend, and know going in that baseball is a game of failure, and he will fail. And you are OK with that and will help build him back up when it happens.

I definitely don't feel it is a sacrifice. We spend so much money on them in sports already and I couldn't care less if my time on the weekend is spent watching my boys play sports. I could chew seeds, pour cold beer into my thermos with random trips to my truck and watch G play baseball from sun up to sun down. We have a two month old boy too and I'm already hoping we finally get another left hander in the family (me). I love it and have gotten in fights with the wife because I've been soft tossing with two boys in the garage for 2 hours instead of helping her get dinner ready, lol.

I coach his older brother's 10u 7 on 7 flag football team and his brother has half the athletic ability with 3x the drive that his 7 year old lil' brother does. That's what drives me crazy. Everything comes so natural to him but I keep telling him that the gifts God gave you will only take you so far as you start getting older, especially baseball! We always practiced but I asked him if he wanted to play on this travel team and that if we did it would require a lot more work to keep up. He said it was what he wanted to do so we'll see how it goes. I'm not gonna' have the family put in the time, travel, and money to do it half ass.

Lots of great advice in this thread. Thanks, fellas. I've told myself I'm going to work with him at home but try to keep all of our interaction separate from when he's with his coaches/team. When he was younger and in tee ball I would go over and talk to him in the dugout after at bats or at random times when he was in the field. He loved it because of course they wanted to hear how good they did, etc. but I'm just going to sit in the stands and let that be his time with his team and not his dad. He already has enough pressure and some dads lay into their boys after they goof in the field or have a bad at-bat. I don't wanna end up being "that dad" but damn it's hard not to with your kids if you're competitive. Still, in the grand scheme of things talking to him during the game about this or that is nothing compared to some of the psycho dads at these games. My goodness. I'm just gonna' do my best to blend in in the stands and we can talk about the game on the drive home.

 

[MajorMike_Ret]

My kids are all insanely athletic. Must get it from their mom who qual'd fir Boston.

I refuse to MAKE them do something they don't want. My oldest could be an all everything swimmer, but all she wants to do is play volleyball. My boy had the makings of a pretty good baseball player, but he wants to play basketball and soccer.

I want them to be afforded all opportunities, I expect them to finish what they start, but I will not make them do something just because they are good if they don't want to. Why have them be the best at what they are doing if they are miserable doing it.

 

[osu2082]

@nathajw

I'm guessing they get their athletic genes from their mothers side! Haha!

 

[AC_Exotic]

Let your kids be kids. There are other experiences they need to be a well rounded person.

I played all of the sports growing up and settled on football and baseball in high school (football past high school). I loved ball, but I also wouldn't trade the experiences of going to the lake, amusement parks, or going to non sports related camps (though I also went to football camps).

Athletics is a skill, but coaches at levels beyond high school are going to look at kids that run the fastest, jump the highest, or throw the hardest. If your kid is good enough, they'll notice.

I personally would have hated being pigeon holed into one sport early or locked into playing 100 games in the summer.

My son wasn't as athletic, but I let him try everything he wanted with just one rule ... you finish what you start (in other words, no quitting in the middle of the season).

He was slated to start the final 2 years in football in high school, and just didn't want to play anymore. I didn't give him a hard time about that decision other than I wanted him to articulate his reasons to me and tell the coaches face to face like a man.

I believe in keeping your kids busy, but also believe that you need to let them be a kid.

Bottom line, tell those idiot select coaches to stick it where the sun doesn't shine. If your kid wants to play flag football, let him play flag football.

 

[Dally1up]

Last bit of advice is mow your lawn any opportunity you get. Travel ball parents know what I am talking about.

 

[cableok]

1) Definitely let kids play multiple sports through middle school.
2) let them determine how much practice they want. But do show them that those that practice and play more improve.
3) if you really think he/she has a skill that could make him/her a D1 prospect in some sport ...get opinions from others. (I don't know how many times I've seen players tryout and their parents are incredulous that their kid did not make the team. They have "parent blinders" because little Johnny excelled on his former team)
4) if your child is very good AND if your child enjoys playing then get you child on a strong competitive team. Playing against teams below your child's ability is not going to make him better. Staying in REC instead of COMP level is no use if your are wanting to improve. REC ball is fine but it is REC and great for being around friends, but will hinder development of that is all you do.
5) if financially you have the funds, a private coach can truly help
6) Finally, in any sport players need to be rounded. And weaknesses cannot be too glaring. But one of the biggest mistakes I see young athletes make is working too much to fix a weakness instead of developing their natural skill strength. If you are naturally a good batter - be the best batter; if you have a knack for rebounding - become a beast on the boards, if you have great hands - learn how to run the sharpest routes, etc.

 

[Cordellhall83]

My son played a few years of little league. The last year he played his team was 2-10...but the team had fun. Two years latter, I saw the father of a "fantastic" ball player from the First place team...I asked him how his son was doing. Yep, not playing baseball anymore. Burn out. They were on a travelling team that played a gazillion games. Now about that last place team...one of the boys ended up pitching in college. Imagine that...played on the last place team and wasn't even a pitcher at the time. Thankfully, he had fun and continued to play. I often wonder what the burned out player could have been......... If the boy has talent...protect it by not running it into the ground.

 

[100TonsofOrangeFury]

My son played a few years of little league. The last year he played his team was 2-10...but the team had fun. Two years latter, I saw the father of a "fantastic" ball player from the First place team...I asked him how his son was doing. Yep, not playing baseball anymore. Burn out. They were on a travelling team that played a gazillion games. Now about that last place team...one of the boys ended up pitching in college. Imagine that...played on the last place team and wasn't even a pitcher at the time. Thankfully, he had fun and continued to play. I often wonder what the burned out player could have been......... If the boy has talent...protect it by not running it into the ground.

Very idealistic.

Also extremely unrealistic. The kid that played in college didn't get there by riding bikes and playing Atari all the time.

Survey Big12 baseball players, and 100% of them played a $hitload of games between the ages of 10-17. The guys getting drafted today are not well-rounded multi-sport athletes. They're baseball players who may also dabble in other things.

 

[Cordellhall83]

The point I was making is that he had fun at an early age so that he wanted to stay in the sport...he wasn't pushed into burn out. For clarity, he did not play at a major college...and is now in Medical school....maybe he spent too much time hitting the books and didn't spend enough time on the field.

 

[The Duke]

My kids (age 7 and 9) play a lot of sports. My son is one of the better kids his age in golf around central Texas, with only 1 exception I can think of all the other kids comparable or (in a few cases) better have 100% focused on golf for all their young lives. Based on my experience as a kid (and w/ observation of the overbearing parents) these kids will probably burn out before they are 12 or 13.

My son played in a US Kids event yesterday w/ 2 kids from Houston....one of them had a stay-at-home dad who was dropping F-bombs on him all day, getting mad at every shot or missed putt, and complaining that he was 'playing so pathetically' as compared to a tournament he played in last week in Ohio or something. Guy was a total a-hole to his kid, who doesn't have a chance to find any long term happiness simply b/c his dad is a dick.

Let your kids be kids....if they want to focus on a sport at some point great. This is probably more straightforward w/ individual sports like golf or tennis, the team sport coaches tend to be pretty selfish at a way too young an age imo.

 

[anon_xl72qcu5isp39]

My kids (age 7 and 9) play a lot of sports. My son is one of the better kids his age in golf around central Texas, with only 1 exception I can think of all the other kids comparable or (in a few cases) better have 100% focused on golf for all their young lives. Based on my experience as a kid (and w/ observation of the overbearing parents) these kids will probably burn out before they are 12 or 13.

My son played in a US Kids event yesterday w/ 2 kids from Houston....one of them had a stay-at-home dad who was dropping F-bombs on him all day, getting mad at every shot or missed putt, and complaining that he was 'playing so pathetically' as compared to a tournament he played in last week in Ohio or something. Guy was a total a-hole to his kid, who doesn't have a chance to find any long term happiness simply b/c his dad is a dick.

Let your kids be kids....if they want to focus on a sport at some point great. This is probably more straightforward w/ individual sports like golf or tennis, the team sport coaches tend to be pretty selfish at a way too young an age imo.

A book called The Sports Gene made (I'm pretty sure it was that book) a pretty compelling point with data that if you want to burn out a kid, push them before they're 14. I'm being overly general -- he may have concluded specializing in one sport is what does it, or it may have been just being pushed. He had some really compelling points about kids' athletics.

 

[100TonsofOrangeFury]

My kids (age 7 and 9) play a lot of sports. My son is one of the better kids his age in golf around central Texas, with only 1 exception I can think of all the other kids comparable or (in a few cases) better have 100% focused on golf for all their young lives. Based on my experience as a kid (and w/ observation of the overbearing parents) these kids will probably burn out before they are 12 or 13.

My son played in a US Kids event yesterday w/ 2 kids from Houston....one of them had a stay-at-home dad who was dropping F-bombs on him all day, getting mad at every shot or missed putt, and complaining that he was 'playing so pathetically' as compared to a tournament he played in last week in Ohio or something. Guy was a total a-hole to his kid, who doesn't have a chance to find any long term happiness simply b/c his dad is a dick.

Let your kids be kids....if they want to focus on a sport at some point great. This is probably more straightforward w/ individual sports like golf or tennis, the team sport coaches tend to be pretty selfish at a way too young an age imo.

The poor golf kid has no chance at all. What a sad story.

Regarding the team sports coaches, that's more stereotype than reality. People don't bother to praise the vast majority of coaches that routinely do right by the kids, but it's easy to bash the outlier and pretend they're the norm.

 

[nathajw]

For the record this select traveling team is something our boy wanted to do. I would never force my kid into a sport. Hell, I'm trying to talk our 10 year old out of tackle until he's in 7th grade at least. These coaches scouted him playing rec ball, I never campaigned and the phone call came out of left field. We had a long talk with G about the commitment and time it will involve and in the end it's something he wanted to do. Where it goes from here who knows but we're not doing this half ass, you're going to put in the work.

I have 3 basic rules when it comes to my kids as far as sports/extracurricular activities.

1 - Grades and school are everything. You screw those up or misbehave and everything else goes away and you'll do nothing but be miserable until they're where they should be.

2 - You're not just gonna sit on your ass and do nothing like some of the friends I had growing up that ate Cheetos and played video games all summer. Sports, band, playing the piano, Boy Scouts, etc. I don't care what you pick (within reason) but you're going to be involved in extracurricular activities and in your community and our Church.

3 - Whatever you do you're going to do it to the best of your ability which includes practicing on your own and as @ThePokewithNoName said, outside of a medical condition there is no quitting mid-season. You made a commitment to your coaches and teammates and I'll be damned if you don't honor that commitment.

 

[AC_Exotic]

Sounds like you're doing the right thing brother.

 

[nathajw]

="The Duke, post:

My son played in a US Kids event yesterday w/ 2 kids from Houston....one of them had a stay-at-home dad who was dropping F-bombs on him all day, getting mad at every shot or missed putt, and complaining that he was 'playing so pathetically' as compared to a tournament he played in last week in Ohio or something. Guy was a total a-hole to his kid, who doesn't have a chance to find any long term happiness simply b/c his dad is a dick.

That's sickening. Kids are fragile and all they wanna do is make their parents proud. I remember watching dads berate their daughters at my young sisters softball games and thinking what that girls going to do as she gets older cause she hates her father and to get back at him.

 

[SamuraiFred]

You guys all sound like your children are elite level athletes. OSU should be fully stocked and competing in for national titles in all sports for years to come with legacies alone.

 

[100TonsofOrangeFury]

You guys all sound like your children are elite level athletes. OSU should be fully stocked and competing in for national titles in all sports for years to come with legacies alone.

OSU 2028 should have 11 coaches on the field that hustle a lot and spend a lot of time in the film room.

 

[AC_Exotic]

You guys all sound like your children are elite level athletes. OSU should be fully stocked and competing in for national titles in all sports for years to come with legacies alone.

Not me. My son is just a guy (like me).

Problem with a lot of parents is they believe little Johnny is destined for the pros (even when they're not even the best player on their team).